Patience Without a Push Will Leave You Standing Still

This ending was, as expected, tragic. I don’t think there was anything redeeming about it. Desiree had wanted to change her world and for a while, she did. She lived in the big fancy house and got to wear beautiful dresses and , at the end of the night, she would kiss her prince. But her happiness was two-dimensional. This idea of fated love that she clung to never came to fruition. Danielle used her. She made him better and he was willing to sacrifice her health for his own. She gave up everything for a chance with him and he must have known. He wasn’t stupid. He knew she was a peasant; he knew he was her only chance. He must have known she would give up everything for him. And sure, he wanted to “keep” her, but how demeaning is that? Her sacrifice was treated as a show of loyalty from a pet to its owner. He owned her. He didn’t think she was good enough to marry; I don’t even think he thought she was smart enough to want marriage or maybe he thought her smart enough to realize marriage was an impossibility. The worst part of this whole situation is that she loved him or at least her idea of him. She was devoted to the idea of being a mistress of grand homme, of establishing herself as the wife of man from her fantasies. She was in love with part of him, and maybe he was in love with part of her too, but hers had encompassed her being. Her entire life became whatever he wanted for her, but he never could see her. That last day when Daniel got married, he looked out into the crowd and into her eyes and he didn’t see her. Her eyes, her soul, were indistinguishable to him. This great love that she became attached to was false hope that had been left alive for too long. It sucks because she gave her livelihood away for him and he gets to just turn his head away, get married, and be OK. She is heartbroken afterwards- not just because Daniel doesn’t love her, but because her dreams, her hopes,her connection with the gods, are not strong enough to get her out of this. This time it won’t work out. At this point, she’s starved with grief and this death of her hopes- the hopes that were the only things keeping her going, the only things keeping her standing- crushed her. Her death is not hopeful; it’s sad and it feels pointless and it makes me angry. The only OK thing about this entire situation is “the promised storm that broke with a vengeance.” To me, this is a Biblical flood that Agwe is going to use to land the final blow on the people who have further rejected his presence. I kind of want these guys to drown after they threw Desiree in the trash like garbage. They blatantly disregard the butterfly phenomenon. They only see what they want to see, what fits with what they’ve already thought. Maybe a flood will wash them clean of their undesirable ideas.

I think I might have missed a deeper message in this story because of my anger. I feel that my takeaways are a little pragmatic and very pessimistic. This book taught me that hope kills. Clinging to an idea instead of facing reality can crush your spirit, slowly depriving it of sustenance instead of ripping off the bandaid and letting it heal. But this book also taught me that you should be the one to define your dreams. Desiree, I feel, has been too affected by the opinions of others. She lets her belief in the gods dictate her actions, and then she lets Daniel string her along. She got caught up in other people’s nets and was tugged wherever the went. She played a pawn in her own story. The patience that she was taught to observe in the book is all for naught if you don’t push yourself along with your own will. Patience without a push will leave you standing outside a store waiting for someone to invite you in. It is you who runs the show; it should be you who opens the door.

A Regency Man With Two Teeth

I am a proud, and probably obnoxious, Anglophile. I love BBC and have watched countless Regency- era mini-series. I should probably be embarrassed, but  I’m not. Pride and Prejudice is one of my all-time favorites. I’ve read the book, watched both BBC mini-series, and even the Kiera Knightly version, which after Colin Firth and Jennifer Ehle’s six-episode arc, was very disappointing. But anyway, my favorite character in Pride and Prejudice, coming in just a few inches before Mr. Darcy, is Mr. Bennet. His wit and tendency for solitude juxtapose nicely off of Mrs. Bennet’s sillness and tendency to lean toward the frivolous. I love his pessimism, but also how he, at the same time, albeit begrudgingly, loves his family. These qualities are shared with Tonton Julian, who is a streak of practicality next to his very spiritual wife. The pair of them, after some deeper delving, are so similar to Mr and Mrs. Bennet, it almost caused me to squeal in happiness. But as that is unbecoming of a lady( Warning- I will probably be making even dorkier comments that this to follow), I’ve contained my excitement over this overlap and instead began a rant in Google Docs about why Tonton Julian is the best part of this story.

My Love, My Love takes from several different stories. Elements of Romeo and Juliet and Cinderella and, of course, The Little Mermaid, are sewn together seamlessly, but finding the edging of these stitches has be my favorite part about reading this book. I love Disney and finding allusions to well-known stories and lesser-known, but still familiar, fairy tales, scattered among the adaptation. But I was most overjoyed when I discovered this connection to Jane Austen, but it is fitting that she is involved; after all, she is the fairy godmother of happy-ending Regency romance. The first whisper of similarity came during the chapter one squabble between Tonton Julian and Mama Euralie. Mama Euralie sniffs the air and says, “it will rain soon. A day or so… a week at the most, oui. It’s on it’s way.” Tonton Julian is skeptical of Mama Euralie method of getting information. He counters quite quickly, and with some serious sass if I may say so myself. He asks her, “Is that your old bones talking? Or did Agwe come and whisper in your ear?” He jokes about her religion. It’s a little belittling toward Mama Euralie, but it is more teasing. “How much rain? How little?” he prods. She retorts, saying, “...You blaspheme. Have faith. The gods have never abandoned us.” Mama Euralie believes as much in her gods as Mrs. Bennett believed in marriage. Both men find their wives slightly ridiculous for doing so. I love their practicality and their wit. Even in a dumpy village or a small (Regency equivalent of) redneck city, both men exude a superiority of mind or at least their belief in their superiority of mind.

Tonton Julian also tells Desiree how the world is similar to Mr. Bennett's education of at least his eldest girls.  Both are set in their positions and are unbothered by the permanency of their status, but both remind their favorite (or only) daughter about the ways of society- the real ones that are not sugar coated by their mothers. Tonton Julian tells Desiree that there are without question, poor people living in the grand hommes. He says, “If there were no poor, how do you think the rich would live?” Both recognize the often skewed and biased views of society and turn their criticisms into witty, rhetorical satire.

Both do love their family, though. Tonton Julian takes in Desiree, despite protesting about how there would be “another stomach to fill.” His responses to questions or demands are usually pragmatic, often satirical, but never the full truth. His outer layer is all sharp comments, but he’s more understanding that he lets on. After all, he is the one who works to convince Mama Euralie that Desiree should go to the city if she felt she must. He warned her that the journey might entail her death, but acquiesced, but only after stating that sixteen is the age of contrived bravery. He wants only the best for her, and though he loves her, does not want to force her to stay at home where she is so unhappy. He does this all amid teases toward his wife in the true Mr. Bennett fashion.

Tonton Julian is not as careless as he tries to appear to be. He teases his wife and questions her religion, but does not seek to destroy her faith or treat her badly because of it. His criticisms are in jest and his aloofness for show. He’s a good man, even Gabriel Beauxhomme thinks so. He traveled miles and risked his life to return a man who he didn’t know, that he knew would never respect him, to his home. He is teasing and critical, but begrudgingly loving and immensely more thoughtful than his, to some, sometimes brash comments make him appear to be.

My Love, My Love Chapters 7-13 Discussion Questions

1. Is Daniel using Desiree or are they actually in love?

2. Why do you think the foreign dignitaries are so in love with Desiree, but her own people don't even respect her? What role does skin color play in how society views beauty in the Antilles? 

3. Compare My Love, My Love's Madame Mathilde to the Nurse and/or Friar Lawrence from Romeo and Juliet, specifically focus on how she says this "love destroys you" and the Friar and Nurse's  warnings on how Romeo and Juliet's love was fated to end badly. 

4. When Desiree's outward appearance changes its reminiscent of Cinderella. Everyone begins to look at her now that she's beautiful. What role does this new found appreciation of Desiree's looks play in furthering Desiree's conviction that this is the gods' plan for her and that this is where she is meant to be? 

Gods Among Men

      The gods of My Love, My Love are everything to the peasants of the Jewel of the Antilles. They are responsible for the gifts bestowed on the people, and even though those are severely lacking in their village right now, they remain unrepentant in their praise. This village, though set in modern times, is very tribal. The peasants live in dirt huts and are shocked to see a car. They live in a low tech, agricultural lifestyle. It's not very glamorous and their work load is heavy and yields few results. But the flora around them seem other worldly. There are bright greens and clear crisp blues in their skies and their trees. Vibrant flowers grow on the land. Flamboyants, magnolias, and azaleas all inhabit their small, poor village, but as the drought becomes even more devastating on small farms, the gods great work is less magical. The villagers still turn to them for guidance and gifts. They worship e gods and what each of them represents in hopes they'll protect their designated "charge." 

Each god represents something to the people. As aka is goddess of the earth and especially important to these villagers. She appears to have been a kind protector. The storyteller said that when she smiled the villagers laughed with joy. When I picture her, she's beautiful. She's more than the goddess of the earth, she is the earth. The villagers allude that it is under her guidance and because of her feelings that the earth behaves and looks as it does. She would have dark, toffee skin and would be covered in flora. Vines would climb up her calves and form like an all natural gladiator shoe. Her hair would be dark and tangled artfully on the top of her head. Leaves and flowers would crown her head. More vines would wrap up her hands and stretch up her arms. Her clothes wouldn't be western, instead more tribal. They would be relatively loose fitting, but tied up around her waist. They would be dark green and made up of huge leaves from some massive tropical tree. The color would only be interrupted by vines that had crawled up her shoulders and around her neck. To me, she looks like a cross between a witch doctor and Mother Earth. To create a costume for her, I'd recommend a ton of fake vines and a hairstyle that would require a bunch of hairspray.

Agwe is the second most mentioned god. He's in love with Asaka and delivered plentiful rain to her earth as a show of his affection. The book mentions an instance of infidelity as a possible reason for his withdrawal from their village. He's the god of water. I picture him with blue face paint on his cheeks and forehead resembling waves. He would be dressed in dark blue and his skin would have bluish tint (I'm assuming that he lives or spends time in the water). He would also be clothed in a tunic style dress with a tribal pattern. Black shapes would be imposed on the dark blue cloth. He would have different lengths of blue fabric wrapped around his shoulders and around his waist. They would lay on top of each other and when he moved, would sway in a wavelike manner.

Erzulie and Papa Ge have not been mentioned yet, expect in passing. Erzulie is the goddess of love. I imagine her in a floor length dress. It would be a collage or reds and pinks. Flamboyants and magnolias would be painted on. Her hair would be left down and flow down her back. Flowers would be weaved in her hair and I imagine gold around her eyes and wrapped around her arms. Papa Ge would be the opposite of her flirty and bright coloring. He is the god of death. I think he would look likiie one of those skeletons from the Day of the Dead. His face would be painted in that fashion, but I don't picture him as an actual skeleton. He's the only one of the gods that would be wearing pants. Both would be dark. He would have a necklace of red feathers and a staff of charred wood.

The gods' outfits all reflect their gifts, and perhaps as the book goes on, their personalities. There are several different ways of interpreting their roles. Some might not have dressed them so much according to their roles, but I think their roles are also part of their life force. I pictured them as usual I real people because that's how they are often referred to as in the book. To these villagers, these gods are beings that they can talk to and interact with, so I was reluctant to make them too other worldly as to make their interactions with the villagers seem too ridiculous or unimaginable. I pictured them as retaining many human characteristics, but their customing utilizes bright colors and living things- things that the villagers of the very poor village cannot afford to walk around in. They look similar enough for their interactions to be plausible, but different enough that it's clear that there are from two different worlds.

    *This is similar to my idea, but not the same.

Almost the "Jewel of the Antilles"

Syncing Up My Ideas With My Paper

Ugh. I hate constructive criticism. It makes me rework things and reevaluate and have to do more work. Sigh. But it must be done. My gradebook will surely be grateful, but for now, I will complain.

I knew before I went to the writing center that my first body paragraph was, for lack of a better word, wonky. It didn’t flow exactly right, and the more I had talked out my analysis, I didn’t think it encapsulated everything I was going for. This was confirmed during my visit. Ms. Swift asked me questions that I had the answers to, but my paper did not. I know what I want my analysis to show, but I tend to try to include everything and everything is not relevant. I have to work on refocusing. I gave more context than necessary in some places and I overloaded others with quotes that didn’t really prove anything. I think my main offender was this first paragraph.

I also need to work on bringing it back to Shakespeare. I talked a lot about my performance and my paper was heavy with it. This is a paper that needs both analysis and performance. I provided context for the scene and a few sentences of analysis at the end of the paragraph, but I think I should probably try to integrate more. I get caught up in trying to explain all of the decisions in that scene that things become a little murky. Clarity is key and that is what I am hoping to achieve in my revision.

I also rearranged my thesis during my visit. Ms. Swift read the beginning of my paper and my  thesis didn’t line up with my argument. I knew there were a couple of awkward words, but I didn’t think any type of rewriting was necessary, but when you have some objectively read your work, they will see things wrong that you didn’t. But she called attention to the fact that my thesis promised a slightly different paper in regards to what I argued was the Nurse’s and Juliet’s relationship at the beginning of the play. I only ended up changing a few words, but I think they make a big difference and caused my paper to take a large step closer to my desired clarity.

Another thing I found I needed to work on was word count. Some of my sentences are cluttered. I could cut some unnecessary words here and there and have a shorter essay. This would give me the room I need to provide a clearer analysis and carry my intent for it throughout the paper. I have a plan in my head and I need to work on making sure it and my paper sync up.

During my visit, Ms. Swift just asked questions. When I had answers, I found that sometimes my paper didn’t. I’m not going to destroy my paper, but I do have to reevaluate, rearrange, reorganize. I’ll definitely go to the writing center again because even though constructive criticism leads to more work, it’s leading me to a better paper. Getting an outside opinion is crucial and I hope everyone realizes the value of the program.

An Odd Trip to Neverland

Peter Pan was not what I was expecting in, I assure you, a good way. My only fault with it did not even concern the performers. It's just that the Black Box is such a small space that doesn’t have a lot of room for maneuvering, and maneuvering was a huge part of this play. Scene changes were relatively frequent, but I like how elements from the previous setting remained in the new ‘land.’ The transitions were necessary, but they were also distracting. I was worried for the stage crew to get everything done. Especially that first change into Neverland when someone was struggling with the tree. I kept worrying that it was going to fall down instead of being pulled into the show. This problem could not have been overcome though. I don’t have any suggestions because I don't think any are available. It stinks that this play couldn’t have been performed exactly as I’m sure it was imagined.(We need a proper theater!)

I was very happy with Wendy and her brothers. I loved John and that little bit about boy children versus girl children. John  is a quirky character and I think Amalia did a great job showing that. Maddy was also a great Micheal. Her personality fitted this role perfectly and her whining and attachment to her teddy bear gave off the whole little boy vibe necessary for Micheal. Wendy was much sweeter than I remember( I admit I haven’t seen the movie in quite some time). I loved that Nana was the nurse and the dog. It was weird at first and even weirder later on, but I liked it. The lost boys were all very endearing. They had some great one-liners, as did Smee. He (she?) was my favorite character. That awkward evil laugh between him and Captain Hook was really funny and almost too long, which just made it better. Again the staging and the Black Box’s limitations kind of slowed the effects of some dramatic moments. There was a moment when Peter stood at Captain Hook’s wheel with his hook and hat and just moved the wheel slowly. People were confused, so there were cast members on stage and the lighting was a little off. I think I got the point, but it looked weird and not in the good way that the rest of the play was.

I loved the characterization of the people I knew well from stories and appreciated the spins that are actually original to the story (Captain Hook/ Mrs. Darling being played by the same person caused me to draw some interesting parallels). I really loved the play and just which we had the space for everyone that worked so hard, to properly show off their talent. I commend the amazing job that was done by everybody that it ran so smoothly and captured everyone's attention for the full two hours.

A Transition to Independence

  In her first appearance in Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet, Juliet says marriage is “an honor that [she] dream[s] not of.” (1.3, 71)) At the beginning of the play, she is but a child. She is unfailingly loyal to her parents and promises that she will not “endart [her] eye” more than her parents’ “gives strength to make it fly.”(1.3, 104-105) But her mother’s concerns have less to do with the happiness of her daughter, but with ensuring the stability of a favorable match for her family’s reputation. When Lady Capulet exits without a final word of encouragement for her daughter, it is the Nurse who encourages Juliet to “ seek happy nights to happy days.”(1.3, 112) The Nurse has cared for Juliet since her infancy and treats her as a surrogate daughter. Her care is unwavering. Juliet is her pupil and seeks advice from her confidant, but after she meets Romeo, her perspective changes and her innocence is no longer ignorance. She begin to form her own opinions and think independently, which can be seen through how she distances herself from the Nurse. I staged Act 2 Scene 5, and excerpts from Act 3 Scene 2 and Act 3 Scene 5 to show this evolution. These scenes show the gradual process of Juliet outgrowing her Nurse. The changes in Juliet’s relationship with the Nurse, from close companions to a young woman and her childhood attendant,  provide evidence of Juliet’s evolution into an independent thinker. This evolution was shown by the Nurse's change from a boisterous and opinionated character to a more timid and openly powerless woman as Juliet's behavior transitioned from a childish girl to a more assertive young adult.

     Juliet's maturation throughout the play can easily be seen when juxtaposed to her childishness at the beginning of the play. Act 2 Scene 5 begins with the impatient rumblings of Juliet. Juliet, played by my partner, is awaiting the Nurse, played by me, who she had sent to gather the details of Romeo’s plans for marriage. She stomps her feet and shouts "she is lame!" in reference to how long the Nurse has been away.(2.5, 4) This emphasizes Juliet's childish impatience. When the Nurse enters, Juliet  immediately asks her of news from Romeo. The Nurse, instead of answering, says, “I am aweary, Give me leave awhile. Fie how my bones ache!”(2.5, 26-27) I chose to over exaggerate my weariness. I grasped at my back and rubbed my knees to show my discomfort. The Nurse is doing this as a way of teasing Juliet. I continued to exaggerate my aches and pains throughout the scene to play up that the Nurse was joking for the audience. Juliet remains oblivious, which solidifies that she is childish and easy to trick. Juliet continues to beg information from the Nurse, but the Nurse replies that she is out of breath. It was staged that Juliet stomped away after this complaint. While her back was turned, I had the Nurse look at Juliet's back and smile, but then begin to speak nonchalantly, almost flippantly, when she looked back at me. This demonstrated that the Nurse cared for Juliet and that her complaints we just for show. This happens again when the Nurse interrupts a description of Romeo with a “Have you dined at home?” Juliet continues to show that she is childish by stomping off whenever the Nurse doesn't tell her what she wants to hear.(2.5, 47) When Juliet voiced her objections to the Nurse’s out of context question, the Nurse again changes the subject, and to Juliet's dismay, complains that her head “beats as it would fall in twenty pieces!”(2.5,52) I exaggerated this by holding a hand to my head and putting on a very obvious “in pain” face. The Nurse’s teasing shows that she plays games with Juliet. She  does not encourage Juliet to be more mature even though she is considered of marrying age. She will have to tell Juliet Romeo's news, but teasing her and dragging out their exchange allows the Nurse to interact with Juliet as if she was still a child, her child. When the Nurse interrupts a description of Romeo with another irrelevant and off topic question - "where is your mother?"-, Juliet yells and stomps her feet.(2.5, 65) In response, I folded my arms across my chest and turned away from Juliet, but I smiled to show that the Nurse wasn’t truly angry, even though Juliet couldn’t see this. The Nurse wants Juliet to be happy, but in this scene I exaggerated and teased Juliet even though it made her angry, to show that the Nurse likes, even initiates, these conflicts because they bring her closer to Juliet. But eventually the Nurse does turn around with good news entailing Juliet’s marriage. I grasped Juliet’s hands and smiled widely at her to show how genuinely overjoyed the Nurse was with Juliet’s happiness. We over acted and over exaggerated the Nurse's discomforts and Juliet's tantrums to show that, in the beginning of the play, the Nurse still treats Juliet like a child and that Juliet still acts like one.

    Juliet's transition becomes clear in her new found authoritative tone in Act 3 Scene 2. This scene begins when I run in, visibly distressed. I ran my hands through my hair to show my distress. I start screaming that “he’s dead, he’s dead, he’s dead.”(3.2, 42) Shakespeare never names who it is that’s dead, so Juliet jumps to the worst case scenario. Juliet comes running to me from her seat across the stage. The Nurse is too invested in her own grief to pay much attention to Juliet, which I showed by looking out into the distance- toward the audience- instead of at Juliet. Juliet asks, “Can heaven be so envious?”(3.2, 45) I face Juliet and reply angrily and forcefully with “Romeo can,” but then I turn away and say mournfully that “heaven cannot," meaning that it is Romeo's fault not fate or God's, that Tybalt is dead.(3.2, 46-47) This is to show that I blame Romeo, but it also serves to further upset Juliet. She concludes that it is Romeo that is dead and that he might have killed himself. I only turned my attention fully to Juliet when I described the wound the Nurse saw to further demonstrate how distraught I was, before turning back to look out into the distance  and then at my shaking hands. I stepped forward when I cry out about Tybalt. Juliet becomes very upset after this, fearing that both are dead. This is when the Nurse finally realizes the misunderstanding that she caused. She remedies it with a slow and sad “Tybalt is gone” and then a short, clear, and angry “and Romeo banished.”(3.2, 75) This is to show that the Nurse holds disdain for Romeo and wants Juliet to know it. Displaying this attitude immediately also pushes Juliet to agree, which is what the Nurse wants Juliet to do. I faced Juliet and grabbed her arm and said this line while looking into her eyes. This acted as a kind of imposition of the Nurse’s views of Juliet. Juliet initially agrees with the Nurse, calling Romeo a “damned saint, an honorable villain,”(3.2, 85) but when the Nurse delivers an unrepentant “Shame come to Romeo,” Juliet experiences a shift.(3.2, 98) She begins to defend Romeo. She steps forward. This acts as a visual representation of Juliet’s defiance. She straightens her back to demonstrate her resolve. She gets angrier as she continues and calls herself “a beast to chide at him!”(3.2, 104) I take a step back to demonstrate that the Nurse is taking a back seat. In a lower, incredulous, and almost scandalized voice, I ask, “ Will you speak well of him that kill'd your cousin?”(3.2, 105) Juliet takes another step forward and begins to valiantly defend her husband. Originally, the Nurse and Juliet were standing side by side, but now the Nurse is up stage and further stage right, while Juliet has gone downstage and further stage left. This shows a physical separation to pair with the growing emotional one. When Juliet begins to cry, she turns away from my outstretched hand. The Nurse then exits to retrieve Romeo to comfort her. The Nurse is no longer Juliet's source of comfort. In this scene, Juliet begins to show the the audience that she can think for herself and is ready to stand up for what she cares about.

     In Act 3 Scene 5, Juliet and the Nurse's relationship suffers irreparable damage. We only performed the ending of the scene that took place between just the Nurse and Juliet. It begins with Juliet throwing herself on the floor and burying her head in the Nurse's lap. She's crying over her father's threat of disownment if she didn't marry Paris. She's desperate for the comfort of her Nurse, who has been the only person on her side since she was born. She ask for comfort and counsel, but the advice the Nurse gave was not what Juliet wanted. The Nurse said that, because the circumstances were what they were, she thought "it best [she] married with the County."(3.5, 230) I had been petting Juliet's head in a comforting gesture, and at these words, Juliet quickly removed herself from my lap and pushed herself away a distance. I moved  toward her to comfort her and explain myself, but as I reached toward her, she turned her head away from my hand. This shows that Juliet was rejecting the comfort of her Nurse. She no longer needed her childhood companion. I spoke softer in this scene than in the previous ones. I tried to demonstrate through my comforting gestures and placating tone that the Nurse only wanted what was best for Juliet because she cared for her. Juliet agreed with the Nurse, but she spoke monotonously and sat stiffly next to her, which showed that she didn't actually agree with the Nurse. When the Nurse exits to send news to Juliet, Juliet gets up and rants. She is angry that the Nurse, who had praised Romeo, was telling her to break her marriage vows. She hid her true feelings from the Nurse because she no longer felt she could trust her. She realizes she is effectively on her own with Romeo banished and is not afraid to take her own life if it comes down to it. My partner stood proud and spoke defiantly as she spoke this final monologue. This scene shows Juliet's move toward independence.

     Through the first scene in our sequence, my partner and I established that Juliet still had the mind of a wistful child at the beginning of the play, who relied on the support and confidence of the Nurse. In the second scene, Juliet receives bad news, and instead of seeking the comfort of the Nurse, seeks Romeo to ease her pain. She boldly and fiercely defends Romeo and chides the Nurse for treating him as the bad guy. She still shares most aspects of her life with the Nurse, but by the last scene, Juliet is hiding her emotions from the Nurse. She lies to the Nurse about her intentions and rejects her comfort. Throughout the play, Juliet outgrows the Nurse's companionship. She begins to take her life into her own hands, disregarding even the most well intended advice in favor of her own will. Juliet's distancing from the Nurse runs parallel to her maturation. In my scenes, we evolved our posturing and switched our roles in terms of dominance. Juliet was the bold one, while the Nurse becomes softer and more in Juliet's background. In Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet, the Nurse's shrinking role in Juliet's life can be used as an indication of Juliet's growing maturity.

Revision of Body Paragraph One

        Juliet's maturation throughout the play can easily be seen when juxtaposed to her childishness at the beginning of the play. Act 2 Scene 5 begins with the impatient rumblings of Juliet. Juliet, played by my partner, is awaiting the Nurse, played by me, who she had sent to gather the details of Romeo’s plans for marriage. She stomps her feet and shouts "she is lame!" in reference to how long the Nurse has been away. This emphasizes Juliet's childish impatience. When the Nurse enters, Juliet  immediately asks her of news from Romeo. The Nurse, instead of answering, says, “I am aweary, Give me leave awhile. Fie how my bones ache!” I chose to over exaggerate my weariness. I grasped at my back and rubbed my knees to show my discomfort. The Nurse is doing this as a way of teasing Juliet. She’s egging Juliet on. I continued to exaggerate my aches and pains throughout the scene to play up that the Nurse was joking for the audience. Juliet remains oblivious, which solidifies that she is childish and easy to trick. Juliet continues to beg information from the Nurse, but the Nurse replies that she is out of breath. It was staged that Juliet stomped away after this complaint. While her back was turned, I had the Nurse look at Juliet's back and smile, but then begin to speak nonchalantly, almost flippantly, when she looked back at me. This demonstrated that the Nurse cared for Juliet and that her complaints we just for show. This happens again when the Nurse interrupts a description of Romeo with a “Have you dined at home?” Juliet continues to show that she is childish by stomping off whenever the Nurse doesn't tell her what she wants to hear. When Juliet voiced her objections to the Nurse’s out of context question, the Nurse again changes the subject, and to Juliet's dismay, complains that her head “beats as it would fall in twenty pieces!” I exaggerated this by holding a hand to my head and putting on a very obvious “in pain” face. The Nurse’s teasing shows that she plays games with Juliet. She  does not encourage Juliet to be more mature even though she is considered of marrying age. The Nurse wants to preserve Juliet’s childhood by holding off the impending love affair. She will have to tell Juliet Romeo's news, but teasing her and dragging out their exchange allows the Nurse to interact with Juliet as if she was still a child, her child. When the Nurse interrupts a description of Romeo with another irrelevant and off topic question - "where is your mother?"-, Juliet yells and stomps her feet. In response, I folded my arms across my chest , but I smiled to show that the Nurse wasn’t truly angry, even though Juliet couldn’t see this. The Nurse wants Juliet to be happy, but in this scene I exaggerated and teased Juliet even though it made her angry, to show that the Nurse likes, even initiates, these conflicts because they bring her closer to Juliet. The Nurse is trying to hold on to Juliet, which shows that she fears the changes that will come as Juliet grows up. But when the Nurse finally turns around, it is with good news that Romeo waits at Friar Lawrence’s cell to marry Juliet. I grasped Juliet’s hands and smiled widely at her to show how genuinely overjoyed the Nurse was with Juliet’s happiness. We over acted and over exaggerated the Nurse's discomforts and Juliet's tantrums to show that the Nurse still treats Juliet like a child and that Juliet still acts like one. 

Thesis and Outline for 'A Transition to Independence'

A Transition to Independence

Thesis:

The changes in Juliet’s relationship with the Nurse, from close companions to a young woman and her childhood attendant,  provide evidence of Juliet’s evolution into an independent thinker. This evolution was shown by the Nurse's change from a boisterous and opinionated character to a more timid and openly powerless woman as Juliet's behavior transitioned from a childish girl to a more assertive young adult.

Outline:

1. Intro
2. Body Paragraphs:

1 & 2: Analysis and performance choices for Act 2 Scene 5- Nurse’s exaggerated complaints and hidden smiles and Juliet’s childish stomping

3 & 4: Analysis and performance choices for Act 3 Scene 2- Juliet’s new assertiveness in tone and Nurse takes a step back

5 (& 6): Analysis and performance choices for Act 3 Scene 5- Nurse becomes timid in her advice, placating; Juliet stands defiant and not so willing to please

     3. Conclusion

The Transition to Independence- First Draft

In her first appearance, Juliet says marriage is “an honor that [she] dream[s] not of.” At the beginning of the play, she is but a child. She is unfailingly loyal to her parents and promises that she will not “endart [her] eye” more than her parents’ “gives strength to make it fly.” Her mother’s concerns have less to do with the happiness of her daughter, but with ensuring the stability of a favorable match for her family’s reputation. When Lady Capulet exits without a final word of encouragement for her daughter, it is the Nurse who encourages Juliet to “ seek happy nights to happy days.” The Nurse has cared for Juliet since her infancy and treats her as a surrogate daughter. Her care is unwavering. Juliet is her pupil and seeks advice from her confidant, but after she meets Romeo, her perspective changes and her innocence is no longer ignorance. She begin to form her own opinions and think independently, which can be seen through how she distances herself from the Nurse. I staged Act 2 Scene 5, and excerpts from Act 3 Scene 2 and Act 3 Scene 5 to show this evolution. These scenes show the gradual process of Juliet outgrowing her Nurse. The changes in Juliet’s relationship with the Nurse, from close companions to a young woman and her outgrown attendant,  provide evidence of Juliet’s evolution into an independent thinker.

After meeting with Romeo on her balcony, Juliet sends the Nurse to gather the details of Romeo’s plans and to make sure that there are actually plans to have. In Act 2 Scene 5, the Nurse  returns with news, but is reluctant to share it. The scene begins with impatient rumblings of Juliet. When the Nurse enters, Juliet  immediately asks her of news from Romeo. The Nurse, instead of answering, says, “I am aweary, Give me leave awhile. Fie how my bones ache!” I played the Nurse in this scene. I chose to over exaggerate my weariness. I grasped at my back and rubbed my knees to show my discomfort. The Nurse is doing this in a teasing manner. She’s egging Juliet on. I continued to exaggerate my aches and pains throughout the scene to play up that the Nurse was joking for the audience. Juliet remains oblivious, which solidifies that she is childish and easy to trick. Juliet continues to beg information from the Nurse, but the Nurse replies that she is out of breath. It was staged that Juliet stomped away after this complaint. While her back was turned, I had the Nurse look to her and smile, but then begin to speak nonchalantly, almost flippantly, when Juliet looked back at me. This demonstrated that the Nurse cared for Juliet and was just trying to get a rise out of her. This happens again when the Nurse interrupts a description of Romeo with a “Have you dined at home?” Juliet stomps her feet and the Nurse smiles at her back. Juliet continues to show that she is childish. When the Nurse begins her descriptions of Romeo, it was staged that Juliet looked off into the distance as if she was imagining him. This shows that the Nurse still treats Juliet like a child and that Juliet still acts like one.

When Juliet voiced her objections to the Nurse’s out of context question, the Nurse complains her head “beats as it would fall in twenty pieces!” I exaggerated this by holding a hand to my head and putting on a very obvious “in pain” face. The Nurse’s teasing shows that she plays games with Juliet. She still treats Juliet as a child, like she is protecting her, even though she is considered of marrying age. The Nurse appears to want to preserve Juliet’s childhood. I demonstrated this again when I had the Nurse get up and turn her back to Juliet after Juliet explains about “how oddly [the Nurse] repliest” when the Nurse interrupts another description of Romeo with the question of “where is your mother?” The Nurse folds her arms, but I smiled to show that the Nurse wasn’t truly angry, even though Juliet couldn’t see this. When the Nurse finally turns around, it is with good news that Romeo waits at Friar Lawrence’s cell to marry Juliet. I grasped Juliet’s hands and smiled widely at her to show how genuinely overjoyed the Nurse was with Juliet’s happiness.

The next scenes, Act 3 Scene 2, starts off less happily. I had the Nurse run in, but stop before reaching Juliet, who is sitting down at the beginning of the scene. I ran my hands through my hair to show my distress. Juliet comes to me. I start screaming that “he’s dead, he’s dead, he’s dead.” Shakespeare never names who it is that’s dead, so Juliet jumps to the worst case scenario. The Nurse is too invested in her own grief to pay much attention to Juliet. Juliet asks, “Can heaven be so envious?” I face Juliet and reply angrily and forcefully with “Romeo can,” but then I turn away and say mournfully that “heaven cannot.” This is to show that I blame Romeo, but it also serves to further upset Juliet. She concludes that it is Romeo that is dead and that he might have killed himself. I remain distracted and pay little attention to Juliet, which shows that I am overwhelmed with the situation. I turn to Juliet and grasp her arms when I describe the wound the Nurse saw to further demonstrate this. I stared at my hands that were shaking or I turned off into the distance. I stepped forward when I cry out about Tybalt. Juliet becomes very upset after this, fearing that both are dead. This is when the Nurse finally realizes the misunderstanding that she caused. She remedies it with a slow and sad “Tybalt is gone” and then a short, clear, and angry “and Romeo banished.” This is to show that the Nurse holds disdain for Romeo and wants Juliet to know. Displaying this attitude immediately also pushes Juliet to agree, which is what the Nurse wants Juliet to do. I faced Juliet and grabbed her arm and said this line while looking into her eyes. This acted as a kind of imposition of the Nurse’s views of Juliet. The Nurse was rallying Juliet to anger. This is what Juliet felt initially. She agrees with the Nurse, calling Romeo a “damned saint, an honorable villain,” but when the Nurse delivers an unrepentant “Shame come to Romeo,” Juliet experiences a shift.

Juliet begins to defend Romeo. She steps forward. this acts as a visual representation of Juliet’s defiance. She straightens her back to demonstrate her resolve. She gets angrier as she continues and calls herself “a beast to chide at him!” I take a step back to demonstrate that the Nurse is taking a back seat. In a lower, incredulous, and almost scandalized voice, I ask, “ Will you speak well of him that kill'd your cousin?” Juliet takes another step forward and begins to valiantly defend her husband. Originally, the Nurse and Juliet were standing side by side, but now the Nurse is up stage and further stage right, while Juliet has gone downstage and further stage left. This shows a physical separation to pair with the growing emotional one.

To follow:

• evaluation of the end of the second scene- Juliet giving the Nurse the cold shoulder and how the Nurse is no longer the one to comfort Juliet
• Reflection of third scene- Last time Juliet seeks the Nurse’s advice; Nurse’s advice for Juliet is only for Juliet’s well-being; Juliet’s immediate objection that she then hides- lying to Nurse; Juliet’s final stand
• Conclusion

Outgrowing Old Habits and Becoming Self Reliant

The video link below is for the compilation of scenes for analysis. I play the Nurse and Charlie plays Juliet. Enjoy!

https://m.youtube.com/watch?feature=youtu.be&v=cUQNRK13bmQ

A Conscious Performance

     The goal of this analysis piece was to look deeper into the text. It was to display the content in such a way that you presented a commentary on the play. I chose to focus on Juliet and her evolution for this assignment. This is a play that is centered around destiny, but Juliet is not helpless to fate's whims. She evolves as a character from a little girl to a grown woman. She lives in a time period where girls' lives were determined by the fathers who often had their own goals when deciding the man they were to give their daughter to. She's not much for much besides giving birth to a wealthy gentleman's children. Juliet, especially, is used as a pawn in her father's political and economic game plan. The only person who cares for her is the Nurse. Juliet's mother most likely suffered the fate that is encroaching on her daughter and has not built a close relationship with her, but the Nurse has acted as her only friend, as well as her only nurturing figure. They are close. They tease each other, and as much as Juliet looks to the Nurse as a mother figure, the Nurse also looks toward Juliet as a daughter. But the Nurse is a childhood companion, and throughout this play, Juliet grows further away from her. Juliet takes her story into her own hands. Romeo had given her freedom and she was obsessed with it. She continues to go against society's conventions and becomes an independently minded individual, but in doing so, she turns away from her childhood crutch. In my scene sequence, Charlie and I hoped to use the evolution of the Nurse's role in relationship to Juliet to demonstrate Juliet's evolution into maturity. 

     With an idea we were both really excited about, we got to work. I played the Nurse and Charlie played Juliet. Our first draft was solid. We had presented the scenes in a way I was happy about, but we still needed to fine tune some of the nuances of the scene. The first scene of the sequence is one that I performed with Charlie before. Before, I had played her as a dimwitted character who was easily distracted, but for the purpose of this analysis, I played her more as a teasing character. I wanted her to egg on Juliet to show that Juliet was still quick to frustration and that she was still as emotional as a child, but I also wanted it clear that the Nurse cared a lot about her. Charlie really had to step up her foot stomping game, which she did marvelously well, but other than that, she had done well acting childish in both drafts, so I was really happy with the result. I still had a tough time acting out that I was teasing her, but I tried smiling notably at her when she was staring off into the distance imagining Romeo and then doing a weird head thing to show that I was acting dramatic purposefully. I know what I was doing, but I think the gesture might be just specific to me, so I don't know if it translated as I wanted it to. I wish I was completely off book, and I was pretty close, but I think I got nervous that I would forget something and was more reliant on it then I needed to be.

     The second scene was really pivotal for our analysis. My favorite part of what we did was when Charlie yelled at me for shaming Romeo. Her voice got louder and stronger. She took a step toward the audience and I stepped back. This showed how Juliet had grown more confident. Toward the end, I reached my hand toward Charlie and she pushed it away. The gesture really emphasized how Juliet was outgrowing the Nurse. We talked a lot about gesturing. I was happy with what we did with the scene. I liked the hair petting in the third scene and Charlie's raised voice and clearly enunciated threat of suicide. I think we needed to work on our timing and pacing. There were times we tripped over each other to say our lines lr rushed through a monologue. We definitely improved since the first draft, but some points felt a little rushed. I'm not very good at gauging the length of a pause. At one point, I had forgotten a sentence at the end of an explanation. I though the pause was too long, so I said, but that just made the scene more awkward. 

     We used minimal props. We revolved around a chair in the first two scenes and a bed in the second. This kept the focus on the two characters. They revolved around each other and spent most of the scene looking at each other. There are external factors that are motivating Juliet's change, but we can see it clearly in the conversations she has with the Nurse. My costume wasn't fancy. A dress was covered with a white apron, and the blue ribbons attached to the dress sleeves were tucked it. It wasn't flashy because after all she's basically a servant. Charlie was dressed in a white dress. This was done to represent her innocence, because despite, her growing independence, she still was a girl. I think the costuming helped to demonstrate that the Nurse was just Juliet's servant. The difference was especially important in the second two scenes to show that the two close friends were different from each other. The costumes were indicative of the the characters' actual societal status, but also, later on, acted as a commentary of the divide between the two characters.

     This assignment has made me pay very close attention to detail. Facial expressions and hand gestures are important when you are trying to convey a scene a certain way. One scene can be presented a myriad of different ways, so it is important that you are conscious of the interpretation you want to perform and that you let this guide your blocking and tone decisions. My performing decisions have become more conscious decisions. I think about what I want to achieve and what tone a person would use to achieve that. It is important to get to know your character well. I got to know the Nurse, so I could determine her motivations. I think my performances have become more thought out. I think doing this pre-performing internal analysis that I'm becoming more confident on stage. I hope that it reflects in my work.

                                    

Take One: Comments and Criticisms

      I'm happy with how our first draft came out. Charlie and I had both performed the first scene in our three part sequence before, but this time we had to adjust our characters. The Nurse had to be played as if she were teasing Juliet instead of as if she was a little slow. I have to work more on making this a little more obvious. I ask Juliet if she had eaten yet after I've trailed off when describing Romeo. Charlie did a good job of making Juliet look as if she was in her own little world imagining him, but when I switch from describing him to asking her if she had eaten, I think making the transition more obvious would help to further demonstrate their relationship. It would show that though the Nurse is teasing her, she loves Juliet. Juliet's reactions to the teasing was good because it made her look childish, which is the goal of that scene.

     The next two scenes were new to us, but I feel like we got the timing right. The second scene is when we first see Juliet stand up for herself. When Charlie started yelling and defending Romeo, she stepped up and I stepped back. I think this change will be even more obvious when we learn our lines. Once we're off-book, we'll be able to focus on our movements and the little gestures that could further demonstrate Juliet's change and how she grew further from the Nurse, like when Juliet turns away from my touch in the second scene. These little gestures were rushed because I would be too busy reading and then before I knew it, it was time for that to happen and I was several steps away from her. Overall, I think it was a good first draft, that with memorization, could form a solid base for our analysis.  

     

      

     

The Nurse's Secret Smiles

I'm going to play the Nurse as a teasing character instead of a dimwitted one. I'll still over dramatize her deliveries, but they will be after a couple of small smiles at Juliet and a look at her when she's exasperated. I will of course be devastated by Tybalt's death. I'll play it up with tears and insults thrown at Romeo, but I'll move to be Juliet's shoulder to cry on instead of be crying on hers. As the story gets more serious, my care for Juliet will be seen more clearly, but my theatrics at the beginning of Act 3 Scene 2 will stay intact, but will mostly be gone by Act 3 Scene 5. Her teasing needs to come off as good hearted, so I'll smile when Juliet's back is turned and then return to a woman with aching bones when she looks at me.  The Nurse's character shouldn't change, so the undercurrent of care for Juliet will have to always be present. I will rush to find Romeo when Juliet starts sobbing. I will look devastated that she's so upset. 

Script of Scenes for Analysis

Act 2 Scene 5

Enter Juliet.
Scene begins in Juliet's room. Clock chimes in the background.Juliet begins sitting a chair. Gets up as scene starts.

JUL.
The clock strook nine when I did send the nurse;
In half an hour she promised to return.
O, she is lame! Now is three long hours, yet she is not come.
Had she affections and warm youthful blood,
She would be as swift in motion as a ball;
My words would bandy her to my sweet love,
And his to me.
(Enter Nurse. Sits in the chair)
O honey nurse, what news?

NURSE.
(moans) I am a-weary, give me leave a while.
Fie, how my bones ache! What a jaunce have I!

JUL.
I would thou hadst my bones, and I thy news.
Nay, come, I pray thee speak, good, good nurse, speak.
(leans on chair's arm)

NURSE.
Jesu, what haste! Can you not stay a while?
Do you not see that I am out of breath?

JUL.
How art thou out of breath, when thou hast breath
To say to me that thou art out of breath?
Is thy news good or bad?

NURSE.
Well, you have made a simple choice, you know not how to choose a man. Romeo! No, not he. Though his face be better than any man’s, He is not the flower of courtesy, but I’ll warrant him, as gentle as a lamb. What, have you din’d at home?

JUL.
(crosses stage in front of Nurse in outrage)

No, no! But all this did I know before.
What says he of our marriage? What of that?

NURSE.
Lord, how my head aches! What a head have I!
It beats as it would fall in twenty pieces.
Beshrew your heart for sending me about
To catch my death with jauncing up and down!

JUL.
(kneels at Nurse's side)

I’ faith, I am sorry that thou art not well.
Sweet, sweet, sweet nurse, tell me, what says my love?

NURSE.
Your love says, like an honest gentleman,
An’ a courteous, and a kind, and a handsome,
And, I warrant, a virtuous—Where is your mother?

JUL.
Where is my mother! Why, she is within,
Where should she be? How oddly thou repliest!
“Your love says, like an honest gentleman,
‘Where is your mother?’”

NURSE.
(Nurse gets up and walks across stage away from Juliet)

O God’s lady dear!
Are you so hot? Marry, come up, I trow;
Is this the poultice for my aching bones?
Henceforward do your messages yourself.

JUL.
Here’s such a coil! Come, what says Romeo?

NURSE.
Have you got leave to go to shrift today?

JUL.
I have.

NURSE.
Then hie you hence to Friar Lawrence’ cell,
There stays a husband to make you a wife.
Go, I’ll to dinner, hie you to the cell.

(turns to face Juliet and the two grab hands)

JUL.
Hie to high fortune! Honest nurse, farewell.

Act 3 Scene 5

(Juliet is on stage. Nurse enters.)

NURSE.
Ah, weraday, he’s dead, he’s dead, he’s dead!
We are undone, lady, we are undone!
Alack the day, he’s gone, he’s kill’d, he’s dead!

JUL.
Can heaven be so envious?

NURSE.
Romeo can,
Though heaven cannot. O Romeo, Romeo!
Who ever would have thought it? Romeo!

JUL.
Hath Romeo slain himself?

If he be slain, say ay, or if not, no.
Brief sounds determine my weal or woe.

NURSE.
I saw the wound, I saw it with mine eyes—
Pale, pale as ashes, all bedaub’d in blood,
All in gore blood; I swooned at the sight.

JUL.
O, break, my heart, poor bankrout, break at once!

NURSE.
O Tybalt, Tybalt, the best friend I had!
O courteous Tybalt, honest gentleman,
That ever I should live to see thee dead!

JUL.
What storm is this that blows so contrary?
Is Romeo slaught’red? And is Tybalt dead?
My dearest cousin, and my dearer lord?

NURSE.
Tybalt is gone, and Romeo banished,
Romeo that kill’d him, he is banished.

JUL.
O God, did Romeo’s hand shed Tybalt’s blood?

NURSE.
It did, it did, alas the day, it did!

JUL.
Beautiful tyrant! Fiend angelical!
Just opposite to what thou justly seem’st,
A damned saint, an honorable villain!

NURSE.
There’s no trust,
No faith, no honesty in men, all perjur’d,
All forsworn, all naught, all dissemblers.
These griefs, these woes, these sorrows make me old.
Shame come to Romeo!

JUL.
Blister’d be thy tongue
For such a wish!

O, what a beast was I to chide at him!

NURSE.
Will you speak well of him that kill’d your cousin?

JUL.
Shall I speak ill of him that is my husband?
Back, foolish tears, back to your native spring,
My husband lives that Tybalt would have slain,
And Tybalt’s dead that would have slain my husband.

(Juliet pauses to try to collect herself then breaks down)

“Tybalt is dead, and Romeo banished.”
That “banished,” that one word “banished,”
Hath slain ten thousand Tybalts.

There is no end, no limit, measure, bound,
In that word’s death, no words can that woe sound.
Where is my father and my mother, nurse?

NURSE.
Weeping and wailing over Tybalt’s corse.
Will you go to them? I will bring you thither.

JUL.

(throws herself down and sobs)
Wash they his wounds with tears? Mine shall be spent,
When theirs are dry, for Romeo’s banishment.

NURSE.
Hie to your chamber. I’ll find Romeo
To comfort you, I wot well where he is.

Act 3 Scene 5

(Both the Nurse and Juliet are on stage. Juliet is in the Nurse’s arms.)

JUL.
O God!—O nurse, how shall this be prevented?
Comfort me, counsel me!
What say’st thou? Some comfort, nurse.

NURSE.
Faith, here it is.
Romeo is banished, and all the world to nothing
That he dares ne’er come back to challenge you;
Or if he do, it needs must be by stealth.
Then, since the case so stands as now it doth,
I think it best you married with the County.
O he’s a lovely gentleman!
Romeo’s a dishclout to him. An eagle, madam,
Hath not so green, so quick, so fair an eye
As Paris hath. Beshrow my very heart,
I think you are happy in this second match,
For it excels your first; or if it did not,
Your first is dead, or ’twere as good he were
As living here and you no use of him.

JUL.
Speak’st thou from thy heart?

NURSE.
And from my soul too, else beshrew them both.

JUL.
Amen!

NURSE.
What?

JUL.
Well, thou hast comforted me marvellous much.
Go in, and tell my lady I am gone,
Having displeas’d my father, to Lawrence’ cell,
To make confession and to be absolv’d.

NURSE.
Marry, I will, and this is wisely done.
(Nurse exits)

JUL.
Ancient damnation! O most wicked fiend!
Is it more sin to wish me thus forsworn,
Or to dispraise my lord with that same tongue
Which she hath prais’d him with above compare
So many thousand times? Go, counsellor,
Thou and my bosom henceforth shall be twain.
I’ll to the friar to know his remedy;
If all else fail, myself have power to die.
Exit.